collection: shining in the dark
This is one of my CTS projects, which is a collection project. Being decided, the theme of my project is to collect things shining in the dark, and use photography or other methods to record them. Key words: things shining in the dark, emotional. the whole collection.
About things to collect, I considered for a long time. I had collected rain drops in every rainy day in London, and then I stoped because I think it can not present my identity, my stories. Finally I made decision, that is taking photos of city light. It is because I always prefer listening to songs and watching city lights at about 1 a.m..Before I sleep, my emotion will always be unstable. Thus I need music to ease my nervousness. I have been keeping this habit for years. It even becomes a conditioned reflex. Once I watch the city lights I will think of those days how I against my depressed feeling. It was a silent evening, I was listening an R&B song on my bed as usual. Then I had an idea, why can not I try to record this feeling by collecting photos of city light? Then I started.
At first I only took night views, and also pick photos in my previous album. Suddenly I found some photos I took many years ago, which was in a great summer firework show in Japan. I discovered that not only city lights give can make me feel satisfying, but also everything shining in the dark can, too. Thus this theme was explored. I started to persist in these themes such as city lights in night, flowers and leaves, dim lights through some medium, fireworks.
Photos are taken and given different meanings. Like these photos in my collection, they were just there and had been taken by me for expressing my emotions. The photo above was taken in Beijing in 2018, I just had my 18th birthday there. As a stranger, an introvert in Beijing, I know nobody in that city, I can not fit in this environment. My new classmates had misunderstanding with me anyway, even my voices were hidden in crowd. It really easy to lose direction in a big city where people have totally different accent. If these photos in the collection are telling my stories, this photo really told a significant one. There are a lot of stories in my collection, which are just behind all pictures. To tell them all to audience, is the very first reason why I am doing this collection.
I can realize this special obsession is tightly connected to lots of experiences of mine. This feeling is complex, a pounding heart giving.
( photo from Cui Cui(2005), Rinko Kawauchi)
( phto from The Eyes, The Ears(2005), Rinko Kawauchi)
Genuinely I would like to say that a part of my thoughts are influenced by Rinko Kawauchi, one of my favourite Asian photographers, especially her album [The Eyes, The Ears] published in 2005. I like when her put her concepts from her culture, and make works with story. A big mount of her photos are things hiding in a hazy feeling, which is the point attracting me. I had been imitating her style, till I got my own thoughts and tastes.
For me, I prefer to hide things in a boundless dimness in my photo, and lights are just like that they got lives, and they are slowly breathing in darkness. At the same time, I want to let people want to know the stories behind my photo.
(#5 Anyue Grottoes Sichuan (2011) by Michael Cherney)
Why black and white? That is a good question. And there is an artist I respect so much, called Michael Cherney, as known as Qiu Mai. His works can prove my thoughts.
Michael Cherney is a photographer, calligrapher, and book artist, Cherney’s work is done with the great sophistication that draws on the subtleties of China’s most scholarly and esoteric traditions. His work is the cutting-edge demonstration of artistic globalization: if Asian artists can so readily “come West,” then what is to prevent large numbers of future Western artists from “going Asian”? Or, like Qiu Mai/Michael Cherney, going both ways at once, both American and Chinese, modern and traditional.”His works have the tastes of Chinese style and also a view from his western culture background. ( W.Tang, 2011)
His works are also black and white, in my words, it is Yin and Yang. Yin’yang ( 陰陽） is a concept in Asian culture, they are the two opposing principles in nature. For example, white is Yang, then black is Yin; male is Yang, then female is Yin. Traditional Chinese artists are founding the balance of black and white and also the balance of Yin and Yang. I want to underline my identity, that is I am an Asian. Thus I use black and white as the main style of my collection. I hope it will be a new opinion to audience who born in western culture.
right( a edited version by using Photoshop)
By the way, as an Asian, I can literally say he had learned one key point of Chinese traditional art, that is Liu’bai (留白）. Liu’bai means to leave a part of white space and do nothing with it. On the one hand, it is in order to avoid that the whole picture looks messy. On the other hand, it gives audience more space to imagine. We can see Liu’bai on most of Chinese traditional ink painting, it is a unique aesthetic from the east. I inverted the black and white of an ink painting, the effect becomes simular with my photos.
Yes, I do really tried to add the concept of Liu’bai to my collection. The difference between my work and Chinese traditional art is, I left a part of dark space. Comparing leaving black and white space, my work will be more mysterious. I want audience feel lost in the dark space, and those lights can direct you, just like how they lead me out of my negative emotion.
And here a special one it is in my collection project. My friend ask me to draw a portrait for her, I picked one reference that taken in the night. I removed those building in the background and just highlighted some lights. I found the theme of my collection, shining in the dark, is also suitable on digital drawing. Thus I planed to add more digital drawing into my collection and make it more multiple. And also, I can express my feeling by drawing.
After the first digital drawing I drew one more black and white portrait. At the beginning I made a sketch to layout the position of my mate’s face, and putted some pieces of color to mark the whole competition in order to remind myself how this drawing will be like. Then I refined the details, at same time I started to consider about Liu’bai. Finally I decided to destroy the original competition I settled. I mixed the background and her hair, and only kept the face part.
When I was collecting in my old phone, I saw this video. This is a video taken in Ningbo, China, which is my hometown. Time list of this video showed me that it was taken in February, 2015, our Chinese new year. I and my family went out and watch new year fireworks. That was a happy memory for me, so I thought I should add it into my collection. After years, for hidden trouble, Ningbo city government chose to ban firework. Because of it I haven’t seen fireworks for a long time. The recalling and missing to my past, were linked with the firework in my memory. I chose to add this video into my collection, because it was a part of my identity, it was a part of me. However, photos of things shining in the dark are countless. It was difficult to select, hard to abandon, not easy to keep. The night I finished my collection, I was unable to fall asleep. I was asking myself a question: [Do my life can be summarized by a collection? ] The answer is No.
In the changing point between 2019 and 2020, I watched fireworks with mates in my flat again. In China usually citizens play fireworks by themselves, but in London it is a great public show. Thus the scope will be bigger than China.
I used this picture as a happy ending for my collection. I hope whatever we meet, things shining in the dark will always be our leader, give a right way for us. I hope everyone can find things shining in their life. And this collection will never end, till the rest of my life. Thank you for reading.